Every Thursday, my husband my Dad and I have a movie night. It’s a night where I have to put my girlie loves aside (I am a big rom-com fan!) – don’t get me wrong, I’m a sucker for a good action movie. One with a good script and good acting though – Like “Watchmen”, “Serpico”, that kind of thing.
So, we sat down yesterday, I put my guy cap on, and we watched two movies (we usually watch three, but called it an early night as I’ve been a bit cough coughy lately due to Melbourne’s insanely cold weather – it’s only Autumn for christ sake and we’re already getting 5 degree days!!) The first was “I-Robot”, which my husband has seen before and said was “A pretty good movie.” I thought it was Ok, it wasn’t something I’d watch again and again. I actually prefered “Total Recall” which we watched last week – I mean, at least that had some fun bits in it.
The next movie we watched was “The Losers” a movie Dave (the husband) and I have been meaning to watch for some time. Mainly because it’s a Vertigo/DC comics movie, and mainly because the trailers looked so funny and kind of like a slackers action movie – I mean, it would have to be to be called, “The Losers” right?
Wrong. Man, this movie was terrible!! For one, it was not fun – the only fun thing about it, and that saved the movie slightly in my opinion, was Chris Evans, who isn’t a stranger to comic book movies! He was funny, geeky, and charming in his characters own ignorant way.
Now, as I’ve said over and over on this blog, I’m a total sucker for character development. I believe that you need it in order to feel something and give a crap about what’s going on in the movie and to the characters. For me, this movie didn’t really have any character development. – I mean, at the end fighting scene, I really didn’t give a shit if they lived or died – and that is the worst thing an audience member can feel. None of the characters, except for Evans’s, really stood out.
The characters were as followed -
The ‘leader’, Clay, played by my new crush, Jeffrey Dean Morgan (who, I think looks like a cross between George Clooney and Javier Bardem.) – He was stereotypically loyal and would do anything for his team.
Then you had the guy with the attitude, Roque, played by Idris Elba, who played Heimdall in “Thor” – he liked pointing guns at his own team when they pissed him off.
Next is the ‘token-piece-of-ass’, Aisha, played by Zoe Saldana, who also liked pointing guns at everyone in her team when they pissed her off, and liked going around wearing barely anything (of course!)
And in littler roles, you have the ‘Family Man’ – you know, the man who just wants to get home and escape all this to be with his family. He looks longingly at his Wedding ring and hopes for the best. And the ‘Quiet cool guy’, who is good shot with a sniper rifle and always wears a cowboy hat that you never see him take off.
The plot is this – Four soldiers get fucked over by a CIA commander who frames them, and the soldiers fake their deaths in order to get even with ‘Max.’ They start to waste their lives away in Bolivia, untill a pretty stranger, Aisha, comes knockin’ at their door with a business proposition – she has lots of moula and wants to use it to kill Max – in return, she will get the team back into the US.
ALL the characters and the storyline itself has been seen over and over again in other action movies – and though yes, it’s true, there are no ‘original’ ideas anymore, it pays to TRY to make old ideas new again! The acting was weird, I mean, none of the actors showed heaps of emotion, I mean, you think that if you had been set up by the CIA you would be more into getting revenge, but these guys just seem pretty relaxed about the whole thing. – Even the bad guy, Max, isn’t nasty enough. Sure, you see him doing some pretty nasty things, but he’s personality is so dry and boring – just like all the others really. The casting was not the problem, I mean, I’ve seen Jeffrey Dean Morgan go to town in “Watchmen” and he was amazing, and even Idris Elba was pretty good in “Thor” – I’m putting this one down to a very lousy script. Instead of trying to write something new, they have stuck to the same plot that a thousand other crappy action movies have developed. Sure, the original idea in itself is a knock-off of the “A-Team” – but from the press and the trailers, it seemed like it was going to be a cooler, slicker, 00′s version with a cool chick in tow. All it is is a bunch of movie clichés, bad plot lines, stifled acting, and jokes that aint’ funny. A GREAT way to lose two hours of your life – and yes, I’m being sarcastic!!